Assistant Liu said I don’t understand women, okay, I want to ask her how she can understand women.

I said, "You said I don't understand women."

Assistant Liu said: "Women are mostly confused when facing relationships. If they don't have enough sense of security, it will be difficult for them to get into this relationship."

It's about security again.

I asked, "Oh, a sense of security is to be her harbor, to give her a sense of security, right?"

Assistant Liu said: "Too many men will never understand this matter in their lifetime. They feel safe. What is the sense of security that women want? Only when she has a sense of security can she stay with men for the rest of her life and wash clothes and cook. But the sense of security is too illusory, and you men don't understand."

I said, "Yes, many times we really don't understand what it is to give her a sense of security."

Assistant Liu said: "When women see too much joy and sorrow, they feel that security is a luxury. A woman's sense of happiness is associated with a sense of security. If a man can give a woman a sense of security, then the relationship will be more than half successful."

I said, "What are you talking about is the economic foundation and the ability foundation? Are they insecure? I know, what you want to say is the emotional security and fear of betrayal, right?"

Assistant Liu said: "Women feel that a man feels safe not because of the man's tall and handsome and good economic foundation, but because this man gives her the confidence to entrust her lifelong commitment, so she is willing to be with him. External conditions may be the reason why she falls in love with a man, but it is not the reason why a sense of security can be born. It is said that the more clothes a woman wears, the more secure it is, but the more men a woman interacts with, the less secure it is. So a sense of security is actually a classic standard for measuring whether there is love. A woman's sense of security comes from love for men, and a woman's love gives a sense of security. Therefore, in the topic of sense of security, men are the source and women are the master. When you hope to establish a certain position in her heart, whether you can make her feel safe is actually the key to winning."

I said, "Well, you're right."

Helanting just couldn't see it from me and couldn't get the sense of security she wanted, so she kept a distance from me.

Assistant Liu said: "Do you know what your biggest problem is?"

I said, "What."

Assistant Liu said: "What we women call scumbags, especially those who pedal on two boats. You are not pedaling on two boats, you are pedaling on multiple boats."

I said, "I don't have it, where do I have it? I, I haven't talked to them."

Assistant Liu said: "Love is also ambiguous, which makes them feel that they have no sense of security and may betrayal at any time. Will you like this feeling?"

Of course I won't like it.

Assistant Liu said: "You have to figure out the line between you and your other women."

I said, "I can't figure it out. I know what to do, but I can't. Seeing their eyes, I can't really bear to let go of any of them. Yes, I'm just a scumbag, I admit it, I'm just."

Assistant Liu said: "Men and women should have their own circle of friends, but men who are affair must be the ones that women hate the most. If you feel embarrassed to refuse and cannot bear to refuse, then she will reject you after a long time of distress. They all hope that their men will always appear in their sight and hearing range. You can have your friends between them within the controllable range, but you have to let her know what the relationship is and who they are, communicate in advance, and both parties give each other space on the basis of trust. Then you say a few sweet words to her, that's enough. Can't you do it?"

I smoked a cigarette, sighed a long time, and said, "There is no way to do it. I just can't let it go. Even if they abandon me and reject me, then let them go, but I still can't let go of the rest. I feel like a knife and I feel reluctant to let go."

Assistant Liu said: "You ask the women you like, are they asking for your money? Is your sense of security so difficult to give? Who is not afraid of being abandoned? No matter how strong Mr. Ming is, from an evolutionary perspective, women are always weaker than men. Women always need others and environment to satisfy themselves more than men. This is for women to care more about the house, more about stable work, and more about a man who has been safe and secure for ten thousand years. Especially men, a man who can have absolute assets will give women a sense of material security, and a man who can promise to accompany and fulfill his promises will give women a sense of spiritual security. Women themselves are entangled animals and need men to lead them. They do not know right or wrong in their relationship, so you need to tell her."

I said, "Does Mr. Ming still need a man to accompany and lead?"

Assistant Liu said: "Unless she doesn't like men anymore. A woman who is truly insecure can protect her if she doesn't even believe in these things. So in life, she will be careful, make money, save money, buy a house, in case of emergencies. Test all kinds of men who are close to her, prove whether they love themselves or not, and verify whether men love her through gifts and other materials, because they don't believe that people and things will always be there and will always have them. The lack of security will be very tired. They will be careful and live like walking on thin ice and lonely. They need to protect themselves at all times, remind themselves to verify their appearance, not call themselves out completely, and cannot live generously and calmly to others. They must keep a mind to protect themselves. When she verifies that others are destroying her, and fails to verify, they will hate, leave, or be self-enclosure, and they will feel more insecure, and they will not trust others, and they will firmly believe that only themselves can protect themselves."

I thought of Sister Cai, and Sister Cai is like this, making money, saving money, buying houses, and hoarding valuable items. Because Sister Cai is the most insecure person, she lives a life of fear of poverty, and she doesn't get a sense of security from her family.

No, Sister Cai is because of her lack of material security.

The lack of spiritual security should be Helanting and Black Pearl.

Helanting lacks the sense of security for love, and Hei Mingzhu lacks the sense of security for people around her, especially her subordinates. Sister Cai also has this.

So Hei Mingzhu kept going before.                                                           

I said, "Verify, you have to figure it out. Assistant Liu, people's hearts cannot stand the test. Even if a person loves someone very much and a man loves a woman very much, it is also difficult for him to stand the test. If you go to verify too much, a man knows that he is verified and tested, and his heart will be tired. If I am tested, I must think, since you don't believe me, why do I still try so hard to be good to you? Have you studied psychology? This is the famous projective identity: a pattern of inducing others to react in a limited way. That is, you don't believe that he will always love you, and you can always turn him repeatedly into not loving you in the end. The less secure he feels, the harder he will be to be happy. Because he is too sensitive and too much."

Assistant Liu immediately interrupted me: "So the way to truly solve the problem of security is not to find a good job or a good man who wishes a good job. The iron job may be lost, and a man may be betrayed. The way to solve the problem of security is to obtain it from yourself. Be able to withstand the betrayal of men and be able to withstand the loss of work. A person with great ability will never worry about not having a job, and a person with very charm will never worry about not having a partner."

I said, "What do you mean is that if you see your partner betray you, you can change to a better one right away?"

Assistant Liu said: "Yes."

I said, "Since that's the case, Mr. Ming is very confident. Why are you afraid that others will betray him?"

Assistant Liu said: "This kind of self-confidence is certainly not a blind charm. No matter how beautiful a woman is, there are still other women who are more beautiful than her. She is easily replaced and feels insecure. This self-confidence comes from the confidence that her partner knows. No one will understand him better than you and can comfort his heart more, so he will never and cannot leave you. This sense of security also comes from believing in love. Although love will come and disappear, love is not a proof. Even if you see a lot of darkness, you still believe that there is love and kindness in the world. Love is my belief that my correct efforts will be rewarded with the inevitable. Nothing can make people absolutely safe except yourself. But nothing has never made themselves absolutely dangerous, unless you. The sense of security must be given to yourself, and you are the person who can protect yourself the most."

I said, "Yes, what you are talking about is the person you can protect yourself. I think although you look soft and delicate, your heart for feelings is stronger than anyone else. You are like Bingbing said, able to bear all the consequences."

Assistant Liu said: "If I met a man I like like you, my first thought was to give up and leave. But love is always a woman's weakness, and I am afraid that I can't get out of it."

I said, "Then I shouldn't have hurt her like this. If I can take revenge and destroy the Four Alliances, I will completely disappear in front of her and leave the group."

Assistant Liu looked at me and said, "If you don't choose her, this is indeed the best way for her. But, are you willing to give up? Even if you willing, is she willing to give up? She can't give up now."

I said, "Haha, I can't bear to leave now. There will always be a transition process, just slowly, it's better."

That's it, I'm comforting myself too.

I guess in the end, no one can get it or keep it. The only thing that accompanys me is myself.
Chapter completed!