"Nannan, we need to take care of small animals. There is nothing wrong with you like dolphins, but don't let dolphins lose their freedom for your own preferences.↑Little Nannan, freedom is very important for people, but accordingly, freedom is also very important for those dolphins.

Maybe Dad said this, Nannan, you can't understand it, then Dad will give an example, a Nannan, you understand it."

Speaking of this, Zhao Chaogang paused for a moment, he thought for a moment, and then quickly continued to say: "Nannan, for example, if my mother locked Nannan at home and didn't let Nannan go out to play, she only let Nannan learn this and that, and let Nannan practice some musical things, Nannan, would you like it?"

Zhao Chaogang asked softly. When Zhao Chaogang saw that Nannan's eyes were full of ignorance, Zhao Chaogang knew that what he said first was too profound for Nannan. Such profound words could not be understood at such age. Therefore, soon, Zhao Chaogang changed direction, and he started from what Nannan could understand.

For children, being locked up at home by their parents and not allowed to go out for fun, just doing homework or learning some extracurricular knowledge is definitely the thing these children don’t want to encounter the least. Zhao Chaogang now uses this as an example, and he believes that the effect will definitely be great at that time!

As a result, Zhao Chaogang's expectations were not as expected. After listening to Zhao Chaogang's words, Nannan's eyes were full of panic. Then she walked to Zhao Chaogang's side, and first looked at Li Liping very carefully. Then she whispered in Zhao Chaogang's ear: "Dad, Nannan doesn't like being locked up at home and practicing piano. Nannan wants to play with her father. Dad, don't let her mother grab Nannan to do these things, okay? OK?" Nannan held Zhao Chaogang's hand and began to act coquettishly.

Seeing Nannan acting cute to herself, Zhao Chaogang was speechless, as if Nannan had a little misunderstanding. She just made an example, but Nannan understood that Li Liping seemed to really want to do this. Therefore, in order not to learn extracurricular knowledge, Nannan directly acted cute to Zhao Chaogang. Moreover, in order not to let Li Liping hear that she didn't want to learn extracurricular knowledge, Nannan still spoke in a low voice.

Seeing this, Zhao Chaogang wanted to faint directly. Alas... The child's understanding ability is indeed a bit poor, but this is enough. With this, Zhao Chaogang persuaded Nannan to protect small animals, it would be much easier.

"Nannan. Don't worry, if my mother really wants you to learn these extracurricular knowledge, Dad will plead for you at that time." Zhao Chaogang first stabilized Nannan with his words, and only by standing on Nannan's side first. After he could Nannan listen. Now Zhao Chaogang's ability to deal with children is getting stronger and stronger. He is already a qualified father.

Of course, what Zhao Chaogang and Nannan said was definitely his true words. If Li Liping really arranged for Nannan to learn some piano or other extracurricular knowledge, Zhao Chaogang would indeed stop him.

It’s not that Zhao Chaogang didn’t want Nannan to learn more knowledge, but Zhao Chaogang believed that at Nannan’s age of five, the most important thing was to have fun.

When a child is still young, the biggest thing is to have fun. In this way, when he grows up, he will have a very beautiful memory in his heart when he recalls his childhood. This beautiful memory will make the child have a better start at the beginning of his life.

Leaving beautiful childhood memories in one's heart will make the child more lively and sunny when he grows up. Correspondingly, he will be more sunny in his behavior and may be more liked by others.

As parents of children, choose among sunny, bold, decent children and dark, timid and afraid children. All parents will choose the previous child.

Therefore, when educating your children, parents need to pay attention to methods and not let their own temperament. If you have your own temperament when educating your children and do not pay attention to methods, then in the end, you will fail to educate your children.

There are actually many ways to educate your children, but if you really want to educate your children well, first of all, you have to establish a correct concept of educating people.

When parents educate their children, they must first establish a correct view of educating people. Every parent hopes that their children are good, which is the nature of being a parent.

What is the best method? Different parents have different standards at different times.

For a long time, many parents have chosen a kind of "elite orientation", "hope their children to become dragons", "hope their girls to become phoenixes", and pursue "big-name", becoming "big-name officials", and becoming "big-widths".

If you just hope that your children will be good for the rest of your life, or not only will your children be good, but you can also become people who benefit society and the people, this hope is right, but if you treat your children as your own private property for the purpose of glorifying your ancestors or realizing your own personal goals, this hope is wrong.

It cannot be denied that there are indeed some parents who now place their regrets, personal ambitions, etc. on their children. The correct view of education should be: adhere to people-oriented and take the healthy growth of their children as the foundation.

The so-called healthy growth means that on the basis of the inherent human nature, it enables all aspects to develop organically and harmoniously, and becomes a complete, dynamic, a full person with personality, a new person with great potential and good at learning and creation. Such a new person must first be a person who supports himself, and then a person who has contributed to society.

Although educating children is an unshirkable responsibility of parents, it is mainly determined by the social functions of the family, and parents are more performing a social responsibility.

Secondly, you must understand the process of becoming a talent and the laws of becoming a talent. You cannot expect to take shortcuts. The growth of anything has its own laws, and the growth of talents also has its own inherent laws.

"Genius is one percent inspiration, plus ninety-nine percent diligence." Only those who work tirelessly and work hard on the rugged mountain road of science can reach the peak of glory.

"Become a dragon", "Become a phoenix", be a "big official", become a "big official", and generally accomplish great things. This is the case, and there is no shortcut. As the saying goes, "If you want to survive, you must work hard", which is what it means.

Although everything can be done as much as possible and can be a relaxed environment for serious things, this is not a shortcut. The so-called shortcut means mastering the rules and avoiding detours.

Parents have the right to "want their children to become successful" and also have the right to "help their children become successful", but they do not have the right to "force their children to become successful" and do not have the right to regard "Jackie Chan" as their only choice. Similarly, parents cannot regard "mediocrity" as their only choice.

Whether it is "mediocrity" or success, it is the child's own business. Children should make their own choices. Parents cannot impose their own values, concepts of success, happiness and happiness on their children.

Parents have no right to take care of their children's future lifestyle. As parents in a modern society, they must establish a correct view of educating people and must use the educational method of "respect, communication, guidance and guidance" to educate their children.

If you want to educate your children correctly, you must also fully respect your children.

1. Fully respect the child's personality

Mr. Tao Xingzhi, a famous educator in our country, once said: "Real education is an activity that complements each other's hearts. Only what comes from the heart can be touched to the depths of the heart."

From the words of Mr., it is not difficult for us to understand. Without emotions, there is no way to talk about any education.

How can we do this? The most important thing is to respect children and respect their personality.

Everyone has self-esteem. It is an inner requirement for people to be respected. Only when you respect your children can you win their respect.

Parents have the right to manage and educate their children. They have the responsibility to fulfill their guardianship in accordance with the "Under-Age-Age-Personal Protection Law", but they are equal to their children in personality.

Parents should treat their children equally. They should not regard themselves as their biological parents in front of their children, and should not regard themselves as having the kindness of raising their children. They should not show so-called "dignity" such as "highness" and "authority everywhere" in front of their children. They should not be ashamed of the children, nor should they be physically punished.

Children's behavior, mind, theory and science research has found that physical punishment for children is actually an act with endless harm.

Children who have often suffered corporal punishment at the age of 1-3 are prone to becoming false, hypocritical, cold, cool, troublesome, good at telling lies, and have a violent tendency. These behaviors will begin to occur within weeks or months after corporal punishment.

The rebellious behavior of children caused by corporal punishment will be manifested in some aspects two years later.

There are usually six situations: children will occasionally steal or lie occasionally or often; be rude or lack-sympathetic to others; lack of self-confidence after doing something wrong; often have destructive or violent behavior; disobeying school regulations; unable to get along well with teachers, etc.

The researchers used a curve chart to record two values, namely the corporal punishment value of parents to their children and the violence value after the child was physically punished.

Pediatricians found that two years later, these two values ​​became closer and closer, that is, the greater the corporal punishment value, the greater the violence-force value, which they called it the "dose relationship" or "action relationship".

Researchers suggest that reducing or even eliminating corporal punishment is extremely beneficial to the healthy growth of children, and it is also conducive to reducing the degree of violence in society.

Of course, many people who have suffered corporal punishment in their childhood did not become abusers or depressed people when they grew up.

This is like a person will get sick. Under appropriate "treatment" or environmental factors, the sick will escape the threat of the disease.

In contrast to frequent physical punishment of children, babies get more hugs and caresses, and children will be calm when they grow up, and be good at adjusting themselves.

The secret is that hugging and touching will cause the hormone levels in the child's brain to be significantly different, and the result is that the "stress hormone" level in the body is lower.

Children are destined to survive in a stressful environment when they grow up, and people who have received warmth from parent-child behavior since childhood can better deal with the pressure of the social environment and avoid stress-related diseases.

2. Fully respect the child's personality traits

If parents want to educate their children well, they must understand their age and personality characteristics.

Age characteristics refer to the level and characteristics of the biological, psychological and psychological development of a certain age. If children particularly like games and stories in early childhood, parents can use games and storytelling methods to educate their children, and they can achieve twice the result with half the effort.

If you keep talking about the big truth, the effect will definitely not be good.

Personality traits refer to the personality traits that each child has. For example, some children are extroverted, lively and active; some are introverted, shy and quiet. Therefore, the same educational method cannot be adopted.

It is very important for parents to learn some knowledge of children's psychology. They should pay attention to observing and studying their children's personality traits, and observe what they think, do and their psychological needs from the perspective of the child.

During the tutoring process, parents should never use "what happens to other people's children" to measure their children, because each child has his own personality characteristics.

3. Give your child the right to choose

In life, adults often have this and that requirement for children, and they need to do what they want, but children often have their own opinions.

At this time, if parents overly force or even forcefully make their children obey, they will not only fail to make their children obedient, but will instead cause the children to develop a rebellious mentality of "fighting against their parents" and affect their children's mental health.

Parents must not impose their interests on their children. Let their children have the right to choose, so that they can help them understand themselves. Self-ability can be affirmed and can enhance their self-confidence.

Letting children do what they are most interested in is the best way to inspire their children to consciously learn internal motivation. Give children the right to choose not only allows parents to find better educational methods, but also is an important condition for children to grow up healthily

If you want to educate your children, you have to know how to guide your children.

1. You have to guide your children correctly

As parents, we must first guide our children with advanced cultural ideas.

For example, when children grow up, they should become loving the motherland, the nation, and the people. People with a sense of social responsibility cannot live for themselves, but should learn from benevolent and aspiring people and pioneers and models.

For example, educate children to take love for labor as the foundation of their lives, and cannot rely on it or be lazy. Only by studying, diligent, and self-improvement can they make continuous progress. etc.

At present, it is of great practical significance to educate children to learn from the deeds of Chinese boy Hong Zhan Hui. Secondly, it is necessary to maintain consistency with school education, and family education has great constraints on school education.

Take Learning Lei-Feng as an example. Teachers let their children learn Lei-Feng to do good deeds. If parents educate them in this way and urge their children to do good deeds, their children will enhance their awareness of learning Lei-Feng.

If parents say, "What kind of thunder is learning? Lei-feng is a fool." Then children will have much less enthusiasm for learning thunder andfeng.

Schools educate students not to fight or scold people. If parents also ask this, children will easily develop the habit of civility and politeness. If parents say, "Whoever scolds you, you will scold him a few words, and whoever hits you, you will punch him twice!" Children will not easily develop the habit of civility and politeness.

Third, parents should guide their children with their good words and deeds. Parents have a family relationship with their children. Therefore, the most frequent, most direct and most impressive role models can be said to be parents.

Parents’ every word and action, every move, has an infiltration of their children’s morality. Parents should teach by words and deeds, set an example for their children with their own good words and deeds, so that their children can be influenced and grow up healthily.

2. Guide children in a targeted manner

Parents must be targeted when educating their children, and they cannot grasp their beards and eyebrows at once. They will limit their children too much or too deadly. First of all, they should pay attention to establishing themselves with virtue. They should not only care about their children's food, clothing, and housing, but also pay attention to their thoughts. Focus on children's ideological issues, educate their children to establish themselves with virtue, and cultivate their enthusiasm for life.

The most important thing for a person is to have enthusiasm for life and ambition. Full enthusiasm for life and perseverance come from lofty ideological and moral sentiments. Secondly, do not observe children from an adult's perspective.

Some parents observe their children from an adult perspective, so they do not understand them. They regard their children's liveliness as naughty, restricting their children from being too dead, and simple education methods form a "generation gap" with their children.

Children are unwilling to speak psychological words to their parents, which makes education unoriented. Parents should insist on looking at problems more from their children's perspective.

Third, we must focus on the key points. During the growth process of a child, some mistakes are irreversible and will affect the child's life, such as safety issues, health issues, etc. You should not be careless about these issues, but you must pay close attention to them. However, you don't have to pay much attention to the child's temporary poor grades and unintentionally doing wrong things.

If you want to educate your children correctly, you have to encourage them more when you get along with them!

1. Timely encouragement

Parents should promptly praise and encourage their children if they do good deeds. They should be good at discovering their children's strengths and abilities, arrange some things they can do, and let their children do well, and then praise and affirm them.

Everyone likes to listen to good words, and people need words to warm their hearts everywhere. At critical moments, parents' every frown and smile, and an inspiring praise can often ignite the fire of children's hope and ideals. Of course, this kind of praise must be sincere and from the heart.

Appropriate affirmation and praise will make the child happy and make the child willing to repeat this good behavior, which will play a positive role.

On the contrary, hypocrisy and unrealistic praise can disturb children or make false claims.

Rewards should be prompt, such as finding that the child has done good things or done things well, so they should be affirmed immediately.

It’s okay to say heartwarming words or make affirmative gestures. You can’t wait until the child is almost forgotten before praise. Late praise often has little practical significance.

2. Appropriate encouragement
To be continued...