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Su Xue thrust her hands in anger and held them hard. She couldn't pull them, and said angrily: "Since you want me to get married, don't pull them here, don't touch me!" She struggled hard, and Chen Si couldn't control one hand, so she had to stretch out her other hand and hugged her in one go.
Su Xue seemed to have been imposed with a detent technique and could not move for a moment. She let Shen Mo hug her and murmured, "Why do you want to say that kind of words? " She finally got up with tears in her clothes, but saw a letter next to her pillow.
Chen Si's heart skipped a beat, and he knew that something was wrong. He quickly picked up the light blue envelope and pulled out the Xindai inside. On Xue Tao's paper, it was Su Xue's beautiful slaughter!
"When Mr. Chen saw this letter, I had already disappeared from the crowd. Please forgive me for leaving without saying goodbye, but please don't look for me again, because leaving you is what I have always wanted to do the most.
"Don't be surprised by my straightforwardness, because today's farewell, you and I will never meet each other. I can finally vomit my heart and no longer hide it. The reason why I left was not because I was worried about destroying your family. In fact, whether it was your wife or concubine, I was not familiar with it. It was impossible for me to sacrifice myself for their feelings. I could not be so noble. The reason why I left was just because I couldn't pass my own level.
"When I met and met my husband, I had no choice but to accept it because of my brother-in-law's life. When I was relieved, I felt guilty about my brother-in-law. But I was unable to make him grow up safely and get married, so I could only hold him to the adults.
It also made you do some tricks of your heart, all because of me.
"It can be said that the purpose of getting close to the adults is to use it, and it will be the same for a long time afterwards. I originally planned to let the adults ask for it as long as my younger brothers and sisters were able to be good. That was because I had no psychological burden because I was a prostitute. No matter how noble I dressed, I still had to sell it in the end. Instead of selling myself to an old man who was evil, why not sell it to a handsome, elegant, powerful top scholar? At that time, the lowly concubine was ready for you, Mrs. Yin.
"But maybe I was too young and failed the first time I took action. Not only did I not fascinate the adults, but I was hopelessly trapped in. I never knew that there were men in the world who could make me miss the food and drink, and I was obsessed with my soul before I met the adults. Although I was in prosperity, I was surrounded by grass in the pond and the huts of the shore, and my heart was full of loneliness. Playing the piano made a sound of resentment from the crane. Looking up at the sky, I saw the return geese flying away, and I just wanted to follow and leave this dirty world forever. "But I don't know when this floating duckweed tree has a root, and that one is on my husband. As long as I can be with you, I will no longer feel cold. I am willing to sing for my husband, cry for my husband, laugh for my husband, and do everything for my husband.
But no matter how noble I am, I cannot hide my dirtyness. I am not qualified to talk to you because I am using adults to make profits. If I have no feelings for adults, the bento is a flesh-and-skin transaction, which is also the initial plan of the little concubine; but I am no longer the original self, so I cannot sell myself to you, because, I fell in love with my husband.
yes
"Love is not a business, and a business cannot become a love. If I really follow you, then everything between you and me will become a flesh-and-hearted transaction. I don't want to become a prostitute in front of you, and I can only give you nothing. Forgive my contradictions, but I am such a person and will not change until I die."
again
"But I really don't want to leave you, so I found a job in the palace. I really hope to be fooled. I can see you frequently and talk to you. I am satisfied. Who knows that the tree wants to be quiet but the wind stops. This wish is all luxury. Not only do you not come to the door for several months, but there are many crazy bees, but there are so many butterflies that make me unbearable. I ask the princess for help. However, Empress Li also advised me to marry early, and told me to be with her younger brother in her family. Only then did I realize that I was alone. I live in Kyoto.
How helpless is the noble child? Therefore, he has long been intent on leaving. "It's just that I have always had regrets and never moved my lover. It's a big failure in my life. However, today, by mistake, my long-cherished wish is fulfilled, and I will no longer regret it. When will I not leave? Since then, I may wander around the mountains and forests, or sail on the north, adjust the zither, read the golden scriptures, be free and free, and have no worries. My husband also takes care of himself and does not need to worry. It is better to forget each other in the world than to support each other."
Shen Mo's heart twitched and hurt, tears had already wet his cheeks. He murmured: "Silly woman. She is full of absurd words, but the last sentence reveals the filling."
The so-called "It is better to forget each other than to support each other in the world" comes from "Zhuangzi". The original words are "The spring tears, fish are in the land, and they are wet, and they are supported by each other, and they are better to forget each other than to forget each other. It means that two fish are trapped in the small depression after the spring water is dried up, and they cannot move. When they turn around, they will rub the pain in their bodies. For small fish, instead of supporting each other to live a hard life, it is better to let the other person live in the river and enjoy a free and happy life alone."
After all, she was just a foolish woman. She didn't want to see her lover bear the injustice and destroy his peaceful life, so she left these words that pretended to be strong so that he could feel at ease. "You made me feel uneasy for the rest of my life." Shen Mo murmured, and pushed open the door and asked Sanchi outside, "When did Miss Su leave?"
"I left early in the morning." Sanchi said with an ambiguous smile on his face: "She said the princess had a piano lesson, and said that the adults were tired, so she would let you sleep a little longer."
"What are you doing?" Shen Mo said with a dark face: "Empress Li is now wandering around the prince all day long. How can she have time to learn the piano?"
"Ah," Sanchi said with a big mouth: "She won't be,"
"You won't go with me to look for it!" Shen Mo kicked him with a plea: "Let Zhu Shisan help you find it too."
But after searching for a day, there was no trace of Su Xue, and she was really gone."
Chapter completed!